How To Cry Alone

Z) Be Alone
     Have to cry

Y) If you live with someone(s) do the dishes
     If you live alone, do the dishes
     Slowly, methodically
     Run the water too hot. Do not resist, adjust

X) Go to the bathroom

W) Light 1, 2, 3 candles, or more
      Look the flame in the eye

V) Pour bath salts/bubble bath into the tub

U) Climb into the bathtub
     Get comfortable

T) Run the water too hot. Do not resist, adjust

S) Begin to cry
     If you can't or don't
     Go through the below motions

R) Do not choke it off
     Do not scold yourself
     Do not force yourself to be quiet

Q) Place your palm on your chest
     Feel your heart kicking back
     Do not tame it
     Your pain wants out

P) If your friend(s) or partner(s) enter without knocking
     Accept this is a misunderstanding
     Not an intrusion

O) Ask them to leave
      Verbalize you need to be alone
      Others can't eliminate our pain
      They can hold it with us
      The scorching coal it is

N) Resume crying for as long as needed

M) Lay down
     Submerge ears
     You will either continue to cry against the knocking white noise
     Or fall suddenly silent

L) Lay there

K) Rotate onto your side
     Submerge one ear
     One cheek

J) Hold yourself
    Focus on the water cradling you
    You aren't actually alone, see?
    If cold, run more too hot water

I) Take three deep breaths

H) Pull the plug
     Sit and listen
     Once cold
     Dry yourself

G) Say farewell to the flame(s)
     Snuff them out
     Touch the candles exterior

F) Dress yourself (or don't)

E) Drink a glass of water
     Make a cup of tea
     Pour yourself alcohol
     Smoke a cigarette/cannabis
     Do not numb the pain

D) Find a blanket
     Become the blanket
     Build a cocoon

C) Pick up a book
     Watch a film
     Write about it

B) Acknowledge
    The flush of your cheeks
    How your eyelids feel like tanned leather
    That there is potential in emptiness

A) If still distressed
     Call someone
     Be held

Even this


March 30th, 2016